It’s that time of year again!

No, not the Oscars! No, not the caucuses! No, not the ‘end of clearance’ sale at Macys! Its that time when Mr Blackwell unleashes the pent up Versace in him and assassinates the celebrities and their dowdy attempts to appear like fashionistas and consequently look more like clothes horses on a Monday wash day!

This year’s first position went to someone who never passes a reflective surface without pouting at herself and stopping to apply a 6 inch coating of lip gloss, Victoria Beckham.

More disasters:

Mary Kate Olsen
Fergie
Kelly Clarkson
Eva Green
Avril Lavigne
Jessica Simpson
Lindsay Lohan

With many of the fashion wearing disasters hanging out in packs these days, Mr Blackwell’s job has become increasingly easier of late, and with the obviously classless moments caught so often on film, i.e., an underwear-less Britney or Paris the job must be almost enjoyable for such an old goat!

The ‘dedicated follower of fashionless divas’ has also named a select group of famous, less than flawless celebrities who need a trip to a morning make over show on HBO or TBS or whatever!

He cites Britney Spears and Paris Hilton as “Two peas in an over-exposed pod.” How hard is it to look great when you’re gorgeous, blonde and rich?

Camilla Parker-Bowles is labeled “Duchess of Dowdy,”

Lindsay Lohan as the perpetual teenybopper.

Christina Aguilera “All crass and no class.”

Mariah Carey loses points for ill-fitting garments and frumpy ‘dos and calls her the fashion pariah.

Paula Abdul is the”fallen fashion idol.”

Sharon Stone -� he likened her to Cruella deVille.

Tori Spelling -� refers to her style as “Down and Out in Beverly Hills.”

Sandra Oh - “layered lunacy” in a Vera Wang dress.

Meryl Streep - very “mother-of-the-bride” when she could be more “The Devil Wears Prada.”

Blackwell does see some good in the fashion wearing celebs of Hollywood, naming his top ten of best dressed females as, Reese Witherspoon, Jemima Khan, Beyonce, Angelina Jolie, Helen Mirren, Nicole Kidman, Katie Holmes, Kate Middleton, Katherine Heigl and Cate Blanchett.

Although Mr Blackwell comes across as a heartless voyeur of celebrity fashion disasters, he does finally demonstrate that beneath that ill fitting off the peg suit, unmatched tie, 1960’s Playboy lightly tinted sunglasses and girlie scarf, there beats a heart of sorts, when this year he made a statement on the visibly absent Britney Spears saying, “I felt that it was inappropriate at this time to make comment, when her personal life is in such upheaval. I hope 2008 is a better year for her.”

But he’ll doubtless dish twice the dirt on her next year!

ABB